Snow's Beauty

Preeti was pissed off, but that was only because she’d been humiliated. There were tears in her eyes, and her kajal, the only make up she wore was crying. Her body heaved as she lay on her bed, unsure whether she wanted to stifle herself in her pillow, or just surrender to the cruelty of life.

Ah, love.

Kevin, why did he have to do that, but he was perfect! It was all Alina’s fault, the bitch. Why she had to walk up to them, just when she’d finally managed to talk to Kevin... uff...

“Hi Kev,” said Alina, as Preeti played the scene over in her head, “What you doing? You look really bored,(she looked over at Preeti) wanna come over to my place? A bunch of us are going over there...”

“Mmm...” He’d looked at Preeti, and instead of saying something, she’d just shrugged sheepishly, and he’d said, “Yeah sure, I don’t have any plans...” and she’d just asked him if he was feeling like ice-cream, and he had said yes... and “Cool ya” continued Alina, slipping her arm through his, “Let’s go? Unless you wanna stand around for some more time.”

They’d left, and Preeti was still standing there, everything happening too fast for her, finally, looking at the space where Kevin’s head had been, trying to figure out how to say, “Oh, we we’re just going to get ice cream.” But, the words never formed; instead as she watched Kevin walk away, tears did, and they ran down her cheeks, she fled the scene...

And now here she was lying on her back, staring at the ceiling, the fan was moving slowly... and she contemplated her life, as it went by, the same, nothing but the same, disappointment, failure, mediocrity... and it would always be this way, why not just end it?

She shut her eyes for a while, then with a strange resolution, ENOUGH! She told herself.

She got of her bed, and went over to her mirror, yanked a tissue out of the box, and with hard, deliberate, forceful strokes, she got rid of whatever kajal was left on her face. And then she looked at herself in the mirror, determination written all over her face, this was going to change. She was going to turn her life around... she would get Kevin... but Kevin... liked Alina, or at least... those kind of girls(that looked all pretty and perfect, and dressed in tight clothes).... she was, well, decently built, nice rack and all, but definitely not pretty... damn, she gritted her teeth, balled her hands into fists, and looked for something to fling, or punch, or destroy, and there was nothing... she just crumpled up the tissue in her hand and flung with all her might across the room, it just floated slowly to the ground, a few feet away, even in her own room, she felt impotent.

“rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” she screamed....

“Whoa! What happened here?” someone asked. Preeti looked up startled, first at the door, and then in the direction the sound had actually come from; her mirror. “relax kiddo,” the mirror continued, “can’t be all that bad.”

“Oh yeah, really, easy for you to say, your world isn’t coming apart at its seams while you realise there is nothing you can do about it.” Her own misery so great, she completely forgot to be surprised or shocked about her mirror speaking to her.

“Well, seams can be stitched back together. Come on, there ain’t no problem that can’t be solved if you put your wits to it... so let’s just give it the old try.” Preeti, looked up at it weirdly, “Please stop, I don’t know where you are from, but if you wanna speak to me, you’ll have to speak English. And anyway, I’d rather not speak to you at all... leave me alone.”

“Hey don’t be so hasty,” the mirror replied, “The language I can change to suit you, but you should tell me your problems, I’ve been around, you know, almost 500 years of memory locked up in me, right back to the first true glass mirror, I’m sure I know of something or someone who could help you out. What is the problem?”

“You really can’t help me.” Preeti was getting obstinate now.

“Then I won’t, telling me the problem won’t hurt, will it?” (Two can play the obstinate game right?)

“Uf...” Preeti looked into the mirror, “I’m not beautiful, okay, that’s my problem, I don’t have the perfect lips, or butt, or breasts, or hair, or smile... that’s my problem... You can’t give me those right?”

“Well... I... er... that is...” stammered the mirror, more confused and surprised...

“Well?” continued Preeti, now angry with the mirror too, speaking as though she were arguing with it, “well? I didn’t think so, I’m not beautiful, okay, that’s why I’m sad... Can you make me beautiful?” she was growling now, her fists clenched on the edge of her dressing table, as she leaned into her mirror, her eyes boring holes through the mirror, threatening now, “Can you make me beautiful?.... No... I didn’t think so...” she slumped back down, exhausted.

“mmmm.... actually,” said a cautious mirror, “perhaps I could, I mean that depends on how you define beauty...”

“Oh puhleeeese,” said Preeti, “don’t give any of that, you’re beautiful inside bull shit! No one looks at your insides okay.”

“Granted. But what they want to see in the outside varies considerably. Take Beyonce, Shakira, and that girl from school you hate, Alina, they don’t look the same, yet they’re all beautiful...” noticing the expression on Preeti’s face, “oh yes, please don’t give me that how do you know look, carrying on... they’re all beautiful, yes? But they look so different, so how can they all be beautiful, because the definition of beauty applies differently to them... and it can apply to you too... I mean, no mother calls her baby ugly, they’re always the most beautiful baby in the world, even when they’re covered in snot.”

“Uf I’m not interested in being covered in snot, I want to be beautiful, like Alina is, so that Kevin likes me more...”

“hmm... are you sure you don’t want to be beautiful the way you can be? Does it have to be Kevin’s way? You’ll be happier if it is your own.”

“What, do you mean? Ways? Look, I want to be beautiful okay, so that Kevin likes me... that’s all... okay, I don’t care whose way that is.”

“What if Kevin’s idea of beauty is something you don’t like...?”

“How can that be? Beauty is beauty okay, and Kevin can’t like anything that’s not perfect... I want to be perfect for him...” her voice trailing into dreamspeak.

The mirror sounded disappointed, he mumbled ‘kids’ under his breath. Then turning back to Preeti, he changed her reflection into something quite unlike herself. Her skin was radiant, her lips full, her eyes bright, dark and mysterious, and her hair immaculate, thick and luscious... she was gorgeous. “so you want to look like this?” “yes...”

“Well that’s easy, all you have to do, is buy all the right beauty products, and you will...”

“Really? But, no... I can’t, I’ll still be me, even if I look like that, I need to be like that...”

“Aha...” chuckled the mirror, “now whose talking about beauty being more than skin deep? Well it’s true to be beautiful you have to be beautiful, as confusing as that sounds, it’s true you know. You know you remind me of someone I once knew... she was really beautiful too you know; in fact she was the most beautiful woman in all the realm. She wasn’t always though... by the way, does that ring a bell, the line, the most’ beautiful in all the realm?’... No? Pity, I always loved saying it. How about this one, Mirror mirror on the wall...? how about that?” realisation dawned, “ah, so someone did read fairy tales huh?” the mirrors voice was now low and mysterious, and deep, flowing with undertones, and slow, almost like it was creeping across the air, slinking towards Preeti. “So do you want to know how Snow white became the most beautiful girl in the entire kingdom?”

“Uf,” said Preeti’s rather tired, disappointed, stop kidding me voice, completely shattering the scene created by the setting sun, filtering through the curtain covered windows, and mirror’s voice. Just as the mirror was collecting himself for round two of mysterious mood setting- “Preeti, come down for dinner!”

Preeti was obviously bugged, “okay mum one sec... hey listen, I’ll be back in a second... well twenty minutes, have to eat dinner. Don’t go” she checked herself midsentence, he was a mirror after all, duh!

When she returned after a normal dinner, still convinced that her parents thought she really was as naive and innocent as she made out, and leaving her parents thoroughly convinced that she still thought that they knew nothing about her life, and that the only concerns they had concerning her was whether or not her teachers were concerned about her, but of course they knew, parents always do. I mean who do you think had the mirror before Preeti did? Her mother could tell she’d started talking to the mirror, and it was with a sigh of relief that she watched her daughter rush back to her room to finish her ‘homework.’ What was surprising was that her husband also noticed something about Preeti. “Something different about Preeti today na?” he asked, “No not really,” she replied, “Why do you feel something?” “Don’t you?” “No...” she looked up at the top of the stairs and then back to her husband’s confused face, her face mirroring his confusion. “Okay then,” he said, and returned to his food.

Husbands, now those guys you can fool!

Preeti came back into the room, by now it was completely dark out, and quiet, a few crickets or something were churring near her window. The room itself was dark. As she stepped in, and shut the door behind her.

“Don’t turn on the lights, It’s nicer for me like this,” the mirror said, just as she reached for the switch.

“Okay, so I was going to tell you how Snow white became the most beautiful in all the realm. It might please you to know, I’m the same mirror, that they used, snow white and the queen before her. You remember the queen don’t you?”

“Yes, the evil step mother, who tried to get rid of snowwhite....” she was interrupted by a chuckle...

“Ah yes... that story, probably the first and best example of state controlled media white washing public brains. You don’t understand do you? Well the fairy tale, is only what people were told, it’s far far from the truth... hasn’t it ever puzzled you, why the mirror, switched from the queen to snow as the fairest of them all. If one found the queen beautiful, then surely snow white who was the exact antithesis of everything the queen was, couldn’t be beautiful too?”

“Well? I see you’re confused, listen then listen... the reason why I chose snow white to be more beautiful than the queen was because she was indeed more beautiful than the queen; she became so...”

“When it all began, Snow had just been introduced to society, she was 16 years old, just past her birthday in fact. It had been a stunning gala, everyone would be talking about it for a few years at least. But there was one thing wrong with it. It so happened, that Snow wasn’t the centre of attraction... the queen just couldn’t be out done”

“And they’re only so many times, you can stand being asked where your mother got her dress from, on your own birthday... or my Snow, don’t you hope you could grow up to be like her?”

“The queen wasn’t exceptionally beautiful mind you, in fact compared to snow, she wasn’t much, but that’s only because we define beauty differently to how they did back then. For them beauty was cold, hard, angular, stern, long nose, chin held up high... the description of the queen was pretty accurate in the fairy tale, actually, but that was the epitome of beauty back then, then of course all that changed, but that’s later, snow on the hand, who possessed the features, that today define good looks, wasn’t necessarily more than cute, even with her 32Ds, 24 inch waste, back then, these weren’t really hot property... strange ain’t it, how the definition of beauty has changed, even though the Oxford Dictionary doesn’t seem to notice..” this was evidently an inside joke, Preeti looked confused and impatient, the mirror chuckled to itself, then noticed Preeti’s expression, “okay, back to the story then, well, Snow was pissed off, obviously... her whole life, she’d been pestered by her step mother, about her clothes, her manners, her friends, everything... and this was just enough. She decided to outdo the queen at her own game. Oh yeah, she wanted to spite the queen. She wanted to wreck the queen, completely wipe her smug smile off, and shove her into an abyss of ignonymity. She wanted to see what made the queen beautiful... and destroy it.”

“As she thought about it one night, lying in bed, she realised, just destroying the queen’s beauty wouldn’t be enough, she had to crush her, to defeat her, yes... she thought to herself, to beat her... she has to know why she isn’t beautiful anymore, and she has to know it’s because of me. Of course, Snow wasn’t stupid enough not to realise, that only the queen could know about what she would do, and no one else. Then... another facet came to her mind, if the queen accused her, and there was no way to prove it, well, then, the queen would not only be beautiful no longer, but she’d also be humiliated. In the darkness of her bed, Snow smiled, as she began to plot not so much her victory, but the queen’s dessimation. ”

“wha...? that’s not how the story goes at all? In the story, Snowwhite is a good, decent, innocent girl, who the queen is jealous of...” Preeti is indignant...

“Ah, and who do you think wrote that story? History my dear is written by the victors... and so are most stories that survive... however, the reason you that everyone thinks Snow was a perfect angel, was because, she was indeed. In the weeks following her 16 birthday, when most girls were expected to turn aggressively towards seeking a standing in society, to become cold, condescending, reserved, calculating, in short beautiful, for their times, Snow did the exact opposite, she became an extrovert, and would spend inordinate hours playing the palace grounds, completely unmindful of her age it seemed. She was even cheerful, you might say... the court and her family was in complete shock. Their future princess was behaving like a complete bimbo, singing songs to the clouds, and throwing sticks for the hounds. She never had one single angry word to say to anyone, not even a scowl when the chef deliberately messed up her favourite dessert, she just said, well, it’s okay, next try better, you can do much better.”

“Ah, I can see, you approve of her behaviour, but to those present there, it was a slap in the face. They didn’t know what to do, her father almost believed she was going crazy, and even the queen was getting concerned. You see the queen really had nothing against Snow, she was the most beautiful woman in the realm, so many people had problems with her, so she did what it took to maintain her position, but it wasn’t like she took it personally, and snow was her daughter, so obviously she wanted her to do well to, perhaps come in second? Something like that..., she almost decided to talk to snow about it.”

“This went on for about three weeks, after which everyone was pretty much convinced snow couldn’t do anything remotely malignant, and would never grow to be the beautiful woman she had shown such potential to be. Even her skin was radiant, and tanned at this point, like a peasant girls, far from the pale complexion that was the craze back then.”

“however, if anyone had known what Snow was doing when no one was looking, they’d not have worried for her, as much as for the queen. Her plan was slow and carefully planned, and I think, I’m still the only one who knows about it. Being a mirror has it’s perks! Anyway, one night she broke into the queen’s room. The queen was on medication, so she was fast asleep. Snow still didn’t know about me, and her plan was still slightly incomplete, but that evening at dinner, the queen had called her a poor dear, audibly enough that even the ladies in waiting had heard. This had got Snow’s pulse racing, and in ‘I’ll show her mode,’ she’d decided to go ahead with her dastardly plan that same night. The problem was that she still hadn’t figured out how to make sure the queen would know it was her. She came slowly into the room, carrying a glass jar in her hand, inside was a dark murky liquid that was also fuming. It looked a little like alcohol, but was less frizzy, and seemed dangerous, if you know what I mean, a very dirty yellow/green colour.”

“She tiptoed up to the bed, and opened the jar, and poured the entire contents of it onto the queen’s face. It hissed as it fell on her, and then bubbled over, like it was boiling, and the queen started screaming almost as soon as the liquid touched her face. Her screams sounded like she was being scalded with burning oil. The guards would be there any moment, but Snow didn’t look like she was in any hurry, she made sure she had spilt the last drop on to the queen’s face, covering her neck too. She stood there watching for a while, and then when she heard footsteps outside the door, she threw the jar out of the window. She went back to the doors, and threw them opened and rushed to her mother’s bedside, and stood there, wearing an expression of practiced horror, it was so fake, but probably only a mirror could tell. And the guards came in. And she broke into tears. No one knew what had happened. Such an attack hadn’t even happened before.”

“several things happened as once, the doctor was summoned, the guards quickly left, assuming an assassination attempt, and much more, the king was summoned from his harem, the captain of the guards was called for, and probably someone was sentenced to be executed. Through all this, Snow just stood there, holding the queen’s hand, unable to look at her, a steady stream of tears running down her face, and as I watched this performance, I realised how brilliant Snow was, and for the first time in my whole life, and sadly the last, I fell in love, Snow was the most beautiful woman I have ever laid hands on. As she stood there, watching, with absolute glee, the effect her liquid was having on the queen’s face, as flesh and skin burnt away, and muscle came into view, she breathed the fumes of the burning flesh mixed with the liquid, and it seemed she was intoxicated. Yet not one person watching would have ever seen anything but a girl completely devoted to her mother, in fact many felt pity for Snow, as much as for the queen.”

“The doctor gave the queen a sedative, while he tried to figure out what exactly could be done. Snow refused to leave the place, she wanted to be there when the queen woke up, she wanted to tell her what had happened to her... she knew she could, no one would believe the queen anyway. Oh God, Snow was o brilliant. Finally, when it was just her and me, I showed myself to her, and she understood what I was, and she asked me, who the most beautiful lady in the whole realm was, and with such immense pride, I told her it was her. Then she whispered, you’ll tell the queen won’t you? And I said yes, I would do anything for her... she smiled at me, but not with love, with victory, for I had been conquered, and left the room.”

For a week snow would visit the queen everyday, and sit by her bed side... the queen’s face was covered in gauge and she needed someone to help her do anything she needed, specially eating, since her eyes were completely covered. Miraculously her eyes had completely escaped damage. And she would see again, once her skin healed, whether she’d want to see herself was a question I didn’t even want to speculate on. Snow was the perfect angel to her, helping her through the day, almost assisting her to breathe.  And I would watch her mesmerised, her brilliance,” The mirror sighed, “obviously this was the one thing the queen couldn’t stand. I’d already told her it was snow... and now she had to let snow treat her like a cripple, her  humiliation was complete, even before the bandages came off there was no question – Snow was the most beautiful woman in the realm.”

“Even the queen had to begrudgingly admire her brilliance. Of course everyone else, who didn’t know what was really going on was a little confused, still they let it pass, after all, duty to the mother was something even they’d heard of in those uncivil times, but watching snow wipe the spittle from the queen’s mouth was obviously not something they enjoyed watching, of course they would have felt better if they knew the things snow was whispering in the queen’s ear the whole time. Snow was taking over the queen’s role at the court. She was sitting at her father’s side almost everyday now, and was flirting with all the most important ambassadors at court. Her father had even suggested that they dine together, so they could discuss at leisure matters concerning the court. When she told the queen this last one, even under the bandages I could make out the queen squirm, and Snow’s expression was so beautiful, like a sword of cold hard steel, merciless, deadly and so beautiful.”

“The queen was out, and she knew it. No one even came to care for her anymore, not even her actual maids, she was completely dependent on Snow, and Snow used every opportunity to torment her. I’ve never seen anyone look so beautiful ever again.”

 “Of course once the queen was healthy, she tried everything to get rid of Snow, but that was impossible. Even I wouldn’t say that the queen was more beautiful, ultimately, completely broken, she used her powers as queen to banish Snow from the land. A stroke that completely defeated the queen, because it was a low blow. It basically admitted to the fact that she couldn’t face Snow one on one, so she just got rid of her. But the queen wasn’t as simple as that, thankfully, or I’d have been ashamed of having called her ‘most beautiful.’ She merely wanted to get Snow away from the court so she could act freely. But unfortunately all she wanted to do was kill snow... which was pretty ignoble of her. Anyway, we all know how that turned out. Snow caught on to her plan, and used it against her to get rid of the queen and get back to court, and find a pretty decent, dumb, rich man to marry en route. Of course I never thought anyone was good enough for her, but I’ll admit, he was pretty close, and at least he did make her scream in bed.”

“So that my dear,” said the mirror, “is how Snow white became the most beautiful lady in the realm, if you wanna emulate her footsteps, it’s not hard, really, I could help you.”

“That can’t be snowwhite’s story, I read it as a child, where did that story come from? Well, that story, hmm... actually I wrote it. Snow came to me one day, crying, she said that people were accusing her of destroying the queen, because the queen, who was now in a mental asylum had spilt the beans to some stupid reporter from a tabloid. Of course, this really didn’t affect matters much, but Snow didn’t want that version of what happened to remain, she didn’t call it the truth, she wanted me to write a truth, to cover up those lies, the queen was spreading. And she was crying, so I couldn’t refuse her, I actually wrote the story you all know and love, and I chuckled at every word. Snow loved it, and looked at me with such tenderness, my mercury almost melted, but I held myself together, and waited. Then she said, ‘yes this is perfect. Thank you. Now though, there are only two people who know for sure  that this isn’t what really happened. They’ll both have to die.’ She looked at me slightly strangely when she said that, and I knew what she was thinking. Before she could lift the candlestand and throw at me, I left the mirror and entered this one here... Not much of a master stroke, not even vaguely in Snow category, but I just wanted to survive. Snow cried about her broken mirror, saying it was the last thing that made her feel close to her mother etc. Etc. And when her mother mysteriously a few days later, she really broke down, and left the kingdom for a while.”

“So yeah, I wrote that bunch of lies you read as a kid, I feel almost bad for insulting Snow that badly, but it’s how she wanted it. And so there it is, and that’s how your idea of beauty came into being,  beauty really is nothing more than deceit... you know what they say, the world is like a hall of mirrors right? No one knows what’s real... well we mirrors do, and so we know true beauty when we see it. And trust me sweet heart you can be beautiful, you just have to look into the right mirrors.”